Starting your child out on the right foot is more than seeing to the basics of food, shelter and clothing. It's also making sure they feel like productive members of society.

The first step in helping your child feel like they are contributing is making him or her feel like productive members of your household. Judy Onghai, education specialist for SCORE!, a subsidiary of Kaplan Educational Centers which works to help parents build their children's natural inquisitiveness, says the urge to do good for others is something already present in toddlers.

Fostering your child's natural inclination to assist you with household chores is a good first step to building your child's sense of belonging and value, says Onghai, who has a doctorate in educational psychology from the University of California, Los Angeles.

"Encouraging toddlers to help out people and think for others is enhancing their self-esteem," she says. "They are able to see that what they do brings out a positive response in others."

Toddlers view the world in terms of themselves, and fostering helping behavior helps them slowly learn to relate to others. As they begin to recognize that their actions bring about a reaction in someone else, they begin to realize, "I can make a difference," Onghai says.

"Parents want their children to be productive members of their family, their school and their community," says Dayna Jornsay-Hester, head of Community Education at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh. "By fostering helping behavior, parents are contributing to the development of their child's self-esteem. They are teaching their child they are lovable, capable members of the family."

Feeling lovable and capable are important factors in self-esteem for children as they grow up, Jornsay-Hester says. Every time a child learns to do something new, it is contributing to their self-esteem and their feeling of capability. Basic personal responsibility, another building block in the foundation of feeling competent, also can be learned from helping.

Onghai says much of the child's future success in school is tied directly to self-esteem and feelings of capability. A child who feels capable is empowered to master his or her environment and becomes an enthusiastic learner, she says. Positive self-esteem translates into academic and school success.

Onghai says research has shown that fostering helping behavior also contributes to a sense of belonging, value and being needed. Children who experience these feelings in their family group are less likely to join gangs and are more able to resist peer pressure as they get older.

"They already feel like they belong to something, their family, so they don't need to look elsewhere for that feeling of belonging," Onghai says.

Jornsay-Hester says fostering helping behavior makes the foundation for happier children.

"We lay the foundation for the behavior of our 9-year-olds in our 2- and 3-year-olds," Jornsay-Hester says. "I think it's a wonderful idea for both parents and children to foster helping behavior. By doing so, you are developing lifelong behaviors in your child."

Dawn Williams, an Illinois mother of a 2-year-old, says her daughter, Susie, has learned to be a helper by watching those around her model the desired behavior and by receiving positive reinforcement when she imitates it.

"If she sees that I've dropped something, she'll go out of her way to pick it up," Williams says. "If I'm sniffling, she'll offer a tissue. She will use phrases like, 'Let me help you.'"

Williams says as she does things for her daughter, she tries to use phrases like, "I love taking care of you." And when her daughter is frustrated with something she's trying to do, Williams says she comforts her with, "It's OK, Susie, Mommy likes to help you." She says she always praises her daughter for displaying helping habits.

"She helps load and unload clothes from the washer and dryer when I'm doing laundry, and she hands me clean dishes from the dishwasher while I put them away," Williams says. "She also asks to help when I'm cooking -- big fun for her, big mess for me, but that's OK. She gets a lot of gratification from this, so I try not to discourage her, even when 'helping' means more work for me."

One especially busy day, Williams says she gave Susie a snack, hoping she'd stay put while Williams worked on the laundry. Susie's "helping" usually added about 10 minutes to the amount of time it took Williams to fold a load of clothes.

"When she realized what I was doing, she started crying and ran to me, saying, 'Susie help Mama! Susie help!' Of course, I calmed her and immediately put her to work," Williams says. "She happily handed me one item after another until the dryer was empty, then toddled back to her snack."

Williams says she always thought she was preparing her daughter to eventually be responsible for chores of her own by teaching her simple tasks like putting clothes in the dryer. But she didn't realize just how much her daughter benefited from these small tasks helping Mommy.

"I still marvel at the depth of her need to participate," Williams says. "Even at this early age, she is finding satisfaction in playing a role in the life of her family. She seemed to be saying, 'See? I matter, too!'"

Jornsay-Hester and Onghai offer several tips for fostering helping behavior in your child.

1. Make sure the task you assign your child is age or development appropriate. "There are lots of age-appropriate tasks," Jornsay-Hester says. "Individual development and safety must be taken into account." For example, the 2-year-old may not be capable of carrying the silverware and glasses to the table, but he or she could carry napkins or vegetables to the table for dinner.
2. Assign small tasks. "If parents are giving out tasks, make sure the child doesn't find the task to be too overwhelming," Onghai says. If the child finds the task to be too large or too difficult, it can actually undermine self-esteem. If the task is a big one, break it into smaller pieces so the child can handle it without being overwhelmed.
3. Make it fun. Helping Mommy or Daddy can be a game when it's time to pick up clothing or toys. "Help them or play a game while completing the task," Jornsay-Hester says. "Then the child learns that everyone has to work, but work can be fun."
4. Give praise and reinforcement. "Everyone responds better to positive reinforcement," Jornsay-Hester says. "We want to praise good behavior to get them to do it again." Jornsay-Hester says it is important to focus on what the child did rather than on the child themselves. Instead of saying, "What a good boy you are!" say "What a good helper you are!"
5. Focus on the efforts and not the results. Onghai says it is important to focus on the process the child follows in helping the parent with a project instead of on the result. "It may be easier or faster for you to do it yourself, but it's important to give your child the opportunity to help," Jornsay-Hester says. The cookies may not taste right or the laundry may turn colors, but the child put forth effort to help Mom or Dad and should be rewarded.
6. Model good helping behavior. Since toddlers' verbal skills are not fully developed, they learn a tremendous amount by watching what the adults and older children in their lives do. "Role modeling is important," Onghai says. "Parents should be able to show those behaviors to the toddler so they can experience them, too. The only way the child will be able to give it back is to experience the feeling themselves."
7. Verbalize what you are doing. Jornsay-Hester says children learn by watching and listening. "One way we teach our toddlers is by verbalizing what we are doing," she says. Talk to your child while you work on a project, explaining what you are doing with each step.
8. Involve the toddler in your tasks. "Let your child become a part of what you are doing," Jornsay-Hester says. She suggests using phrases like, "Get Mommy a diaper," "What a good job you do" and "Mommy needs a helper" as ways to involve your child in your activities.

Some activities Onghai and Jornsay-Hester recommend include: setting the table, folding napkins, picking up toys, sorting laundry, matching socks, feeding the family pet, helping measure or pour ingredients for cooking, help with a younger sibling, helping garden and finding lost items.

"They don't necessarily have to find it," Onghai says. "The idea they are looking with you is good enough."

Onghai also suggests finding books about famous people who helped others to read together, or watching videos or television shows with themes related to helping or caring for others.