Children begin their lives with parents deciding their food choice, either breastmilk or formula. Once children are old enough, parents slowly add solid foods to their children's diet. Parents want to ensure that their children grow up healthy and strong aided by a proper diet with nutritious food every day. Sometimes, these children don't share in their parents' plans.

Toddlers are often finicky or picky eaters. The variety of foods they consume may be very limited. They may find something they like and demand this food item daily or perhaps in place of every meal. Picky eaters can cause their parents much stress; frequently parents fear their toddlers are barely taking in enough food to sustain life, let alone provide an adequate source of nutrition.

"My 2-year-old will eat nothing but Cheerios from the time she gets up until her Daddy gets home from work, and I do mean nothing," says Wendy Euchre from Richmond, Va. "She will drink milk, water and juice, but will not eat any other food but dry, out-of-the-box Cheerios. I've tried everything but she won't budge from the Cheerios. So, to avoid a major war, we buy tons of Cheerios knowing that none will be wasted."

The choices the picky toddler makes are frequently a matter of will. When a toddler refuses food, he is not refusing to eat – he is simply conveying a message: 'I want to decide,'" says Martha Pieper, co-author of Smart Love and a columnist for Chicago Parent magazine. "Children 2 to 5 years old are learning to be independent. They are learning what they like and don't like and making choices based on these things. They can tell you what they think, feel and want. That's one of the main reasons toddlers refuse food or become picky eaters: They want to decide for themselves."

Once you recognize the reason behind your child's picky eating habits, you can approach the situation differently. "My daughter was a wonderful eater as a baby. Once she turned 3 that changed," says Sheri White, a writer from Frederick, Md. "She wouldn't eat anything I cooked, and dinnertime became a battleground. Unfortunately, I didn't really know anything about control issues and only now realize it was her way of trying to control what she could. Now, I offer her things she likes as well as things she needs, but I offer them in fun ways and with no pressure."

It's tough when you're concerned that your child's nutrition may be lacking. But instead of turning the dinner table into a battleground, "simply give the child a vitamin everyday," says Pieper. "Whatever the child's favorite character, there is probably a vitamin out there in that character's shape. Children's vitamins are a good choice to supplement the diet and will ensure the child is getting essential nutrients."

Parents may have unacceptable expectations as to how much a toddler should eat. Pieper says, "A 2 1/2-year-old is rarely hungry the way a grown up is hungry. They are rarely hungry on a three-meal-a-day schedule. If they run around, they get hungry; if they are growing, they get hungry. We recommend for a toddler that parents not have the expectation that the child is going to eat on their schedule. It's not developmentally correct."

You may not be able to control how much your toddler eats, but you can ensure that you offer healthy food choices. Allowing a picky eater to choose from a variety of good choices increases the possibility that the child will eat, or eat more. "Parents can control their cupboards and have healthy snacks available," says Pieper. "There are lots of healthy snacks that can be made accessible to toddlers throughout the day. Toddlers do eat better if they are given a choice of three or four items and let them choose."

Be creative with meals as well as with presentation. "My son was a picky eater from his first bite of cereal," says Pam Kock, a freelance writer from southwestern Ohio. "He refuses to try anything new, even if it is one of his favorite foods in a different form. I am looking for ways to present food so that I can trick him into eating more variety or encourage him to try new things. So far, he's been too smart to fall for it – or maybe I haven't been creative enough."

Let the creativity flow when preparing meals for picky eaters. For example, it may not be proper etiquette to allow small children to eat with their hands, but finger foods can be fun and adventurous. Serve hot-dogs, French fries, chopped vegetables or fruit in small "bite-size" pieces. In addition, provide various sauces and dips that allow children to "dunk" their food to add to the excitement of mealtime.

Make the situation less stressful for yourself and your toddler – take off the pressure, provide nutritional snacks and allow the child to decide. However, if your child has become a picky eater and you note a substantial weight loss – 15 percent or more – seek medical advice.

Want to see more?

• Toddler Nutrition: Building a Healthy Relationship with Food
• The Challenge of Feeding Your Toddler
• How do we meet our toddler's nutritional needs when he's so picky?
• Talk about it!

About the Author: Carma Haley Shoemaker is a mother, nurse and contributing writer for iParenting.com.