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April 22, 2003
April 21, 2003
I have debated about weather or not I want to talk about my relationship with Joe in this journal or not. There are just some things I wanted to keep private and between the two of us. However, I think everyone would agree with me that nobody really has the perfect marriage and if they try to tell themselves that, they live in a make-believe land. Hopefully, one day my children will appreciate my honesty about my marriage in this journal and it will give them an even better insight into who their parents really were.
Joe and I love each other more then anything. I remember when we first started dating, how much I adored Joe. He was the picture of everything I had wanted in a husband. I was only 16 (almost) when we met and although I was young, I just knew I would marry him. Anyway, fast forward to present. The last couple of months, I have noticed that we are bickering more then usual. Joe thinks I am picking at all his faults and I feel he is doing the same to me. I want him to do more around the house and just be home more and he wants me to stop nagging and being so grumpy. This weekend was particularly hard and we fought (quietly with under our breath comments) about every little thing. As we got home from church Joe asked me if I had gotten anything out of the service. I was very hurt that he was sitting in church thinking about what I WAS GETTING out of it, instead of taking something for himself from it? ~Ugh~ I tried to talk to him about it, but since he did not like my response he immediately ended the conversation. I was very quiet for the rest of the day and did a lot of praying. By evening we seemed to be doing much better and I have decided to just do my best to stop the nagging and be as up-beat and pleasant as I can. To just drag this bickering out until I prove a point will be too emotionally draining and a waste of my time.
~*EASTER*~
On Sunday J.t. decided to wake up at FIVE o’clock in the morning and try to wake up the other two. We decided to torture him and make him wait until 7:30 in our room while the other kids continued to sleep. Bad Bad mommy and daddy lol . The way he was lying on the floor moaning and whining as if he was in severe pain was a bit annoying and I was ready to lock myself in the bathroom and go back to sleep myself. When we did let the kids downstairs it was a mad dash to find Easter eggs and put them in their baskets. Alec found one egg and was happy with just playing with it. J.t. was running around like crazy, knocking over anyone in his way to get as many eggs as possible. Autumn was throwing a fit because she would go to get an egg and J.t. was racing past her and getting them first. Finally, we had to step in and tell J.t. to cool it down a little. A couple times Autumn would find two eggs in one place, and then give one to J.t. It was a very LOUD Easter morning. LOL The kids really enjoyed their baskets with only fruit snacks, crackers, chips and fruit. They did not miss getting a bunch of candy and I was thankful for that.
Getting ready for church was running very smoothly until J.t. decided he did not want to cooperate. Oh my goodness he pulled his sweater off about 5 times, messed up his hair on purpose as I was trying to do it, didn’t want to wear his sandals and just tested me to the max the entire time. I admit that I lost my cool and yelled at him in the midst of trying to get his hair done. I immediately felt bad about it as I have done so well with not yelling at him. I explained to him why I had yelled and asked him to help me, by trying to cooperate with me a little more.
We finally get to church and I immediately feel calm, and happy. My children looked beautiful and I was so proud of them as we walked them to their classes. Alec walked right into his classroom without hesitation this week He stalled for a moment at the door with his arms crossed but then quickly got involved with the bubble machine they had going. I could not believe how crowded the church was and was so happy to see many new faces. The music was wonderful and the service was amazing. Joe told me that when he was picking J.t. up from Sunday school they were doing a really cool activity. They gave all the kids an Easter egg and told them to open them. When they opened them and all said “It is empty!” the teacher smiled and said “It is not empty and in fact is very full… just like the tomb that Jesus was in when he rose up.” All the kids’ faces lit up and was very sweet to see. Joe also said he got a little tear in his eye as he watch J.t. singing and dancing words of worship with all the other children.
After church we stopped at my moms for a couple of minutes and then went home for about half an hour to clean up the mess from the morning and to kill some time before we had to go over the Brookes (my sil) house. We had a very nice time and I have to say that each time I get together with sil, I love her more and more. We stayed for a couple of hours and then had to leave to go meet my parents for dinner.
Autumn and Alec fell asleep on the way to the restaurant and I felt so bad about waking them up and was worried we would have out hands full at dinner. I was pleasantly surprised that they both woke up in cheerful moods and were ready to socialize with everyone. Dinner was excellent and of course we stuffed ourselves more then we should have. J.t. ate 4 plates of crab legs; some mashes potatoes, shrimp, vegetables, 2 helpings of ice cream and some other little things he nibbled on. That child can eat non-stop and he is only seven… I can’t imagine what he is going to eat when he is about 15 years old. I better start saving now. LOL
After dinner we headed back to my moms house for another Easter egg hunt for the kids. They had a blast and I could not believe how many eggs were hidden throughout the house. After the hunt J.t and Autumn helped Oma take out all the goodies in the eggs and put them in different baggies. They got more fruit snacks, crackers, pretzel and cheese things, gummy worms, bears and fish and a little bit of chocolate. I think I have enough snacks for lunches for about a month now. Shortly after we got home the kids were sleeping soundly and had smiles on their sticky, messy faces… it was a good Easter. I can’t imagine celebrating Holidays without my children. They bring so much energy and excitement to the day .
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