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March 26, 2003

Sorry in advance for spelling and grammer mistakes.

Time if of the Essence
(Irene Foster)
Now is the time to get things done . . .
Wade in the water,
Sit in the sun,
Squish my toes in the mud by the door
Explore the world with a boy just four.
Now is the time to study books,
Flowers,
Snails,
How a cloud looks,
To ponder "up,"
Where God sleeps nights,
Why mosquitoes take such big bites.
Later there'll be time
To sew and clean
Paint the hall
That soft new green,
To make new drapes, refinish the floor,
Later on . . . when he's not just four.



3/21/03
*War*
My mind is going in about 30 different directions at the moment and I must admit I am scared, sad, angry and confused. As of right now, I do not think my children know exactly what is going on and the word "War" is just another word to them. I had a long session with my life coach this afternoon and the discussion of explaining War to my children was the topic I chose to discuss. I believe that my children do need to know what is going on in the world. I would love to shelter them from all evil; however that would be unfair of me to do to them. When the September 11th attacks happened, the kids had several questions. I believe that being the oldest, J.T. presented us with the most questions and seemed to show fear more then the other two children. One of his questions was “Why didn’t we know this was going to happen?” It is that question that has stuck in my mind and is with me as I write this. I need to tell J.t. what is happening in another country so that IF something does happen in our country he will have an understanding as to why it is happening. Does this make sense? Joe and I plan to sit down with the kids this evening (Friday) and talk to them about it.
At first I was not going to voice my opinion on the war in this diary but then I had a quick reality check. This is my diary for my kids, so I should write as I feel for them. I am scared to death of this War. I have had a hard time sleeping and can’t seem to turn away from the coverage on TV when the kids are not around. However, I refuse to let this overrun my life and take away from family and living a happy life.I am not going to cancel our vacation in May or pass on taking my kids to the park, so I can watch even more news coverage.
I stand behind our president 100% and feel that he is doing a great job. If this war did not happen now, it would have eventually happened. I believe that everyone has the right to voice their opinion on this war and that is what is so great about where we live. In my opinion though, for me to go out and protest this war I would be disrespecting the men that are over there fighting for our freedom. I have talked to several family members and friends that are in the military and all have said that when they hear the protests it is like a slap in the face. We are at War now. There is nothing we can do to change that now, we just have to support our country now and support the brave men and women who are fighting for us. As a women I have such a hard time thinking that this war is wrong…the way the women are treated in Iraq is horrific and it is very obvious to me that many things need to change in that country.
I am sure I will get slammed with e-mails about my views on this but all I can say is I stand behind what I say. :O)

3/24/03
Joe and I decided to sit down and have a talk with J.T. and Autumn on Friday night about the War. I must say they took it very well and asked a lot of good questions. After we told them that the war was not in our country and got out a map and showed them were it was, they seemed a little more at ease. We did not tell them about the war to frightened them; just prepare them in case anything does happen in our country. Plus, you cannot turn on a radio or tv without hearing about the war so they would have heard about it sooner then later and I would rather they hear it from us. Obviously, Alec has no clue about what is going on and just goes on with life as usual. :o) Lucky kid.

*Alec and his lump*
Alec still has a lump on his neck (left side) and I have decided to give him until Friday and then I am calling the Dr again. I have been a basket case about this even though I have had several people tell me that these are normal. Every time I look at him I focus on this little lump and try to see if I can see any change in it. That’s one of the many trials of motherhood-Worry.

*Loosing weight*
It is amazing what loosing 10 pounds can do for my self esteem. On Sunday, I had a Bridal shower to attend. I was feeling a bit blah, because I did not have anything nice to wear as the weather is starting to get so nice. While I was out grocery shopping I stopped off and picked up a very cute modern shirt. It is very light weight with the new funky sleeves that are so popular now. I went home and got ready for the bridal shower. When I was putting my dress pants on I noticed that they were almost too big and did not stay up very well. Wow… I have to say I had a grin ear to ear and felt pretty good. I changed into a some smaller pants that I have not been able to wear since after I had Autumn and wooohooo they fit perfectly. To say I was please with myself would be an understatement. I decided to go prance myself in front of Joe and ask him how I looked. After he raised his eyebrow and did a look over he said “Wow, you look really good” I have been in a GREAT mood ever since and today I actually got up early and got myself all dressed up, put some makeup on and wore nice clothes… just because. :o) I think that I will be going clothes shopping this weekend and splurge a little on some new outfits. :O)

*Spring Break*
It is Spring Break for J.T. this week and so far, so good.(Although, it is ONLY Monday LOL ) The weather was really nice today so we went to the park for about 2 hours this morning and then the kids all played in the backyard and had a picnic lunch . I think that if I keep J.T. busy and we are not cooped up in the house all day this Spring Break will not be bad at all. *fingers crossed* .

3/26
* Update on TV*
I am happy to report that we are doing much better on limiting the kids tv time. I will admit that it is still a work in progress and will take time… we are on our way to watching maybe at the most only ½ an hour of tv each day. My plan is to have my goal achieved by mid-April. Now, as for Joe and I , that is a different story. lol When the kids are in bed we pop in the taped shows and enjoy watching them without being forced to watch commercials. LOL I can’t wait for the new Bachelor tonight and have really enjoyed American Idol this time around.


*WHAT I LOVE ABOUT YOU*
~Autumn~

* You have such a LOVE for life. You are the one who stops to look at a flower, or just look up in the sky.
* Your love and compassion for animals is so strong. If you see an ant in the house you will pick up carefully and then place it outside.
* I love your pretty dark hair, you are just so refreshing and beautiful, it sometimes leaves me speechless.
* Your desire to be like mommy and to be a mom and a Dr. one day. You often talk about how you are going to have 3 girls and boy when you grow up. I truly believe you will get what you set out to do.
* Your stubbornness and determination. Although, theses traits can prove to be trying at times, they are good ones to have.
* Your desire to Learn new things all time. You are the one to ask 100 questions each day and will not be satisfied until you get an answer you feel is adequate. You do not settle for “ That is just the way it is honey.”
* I love the way you talk. It is hard to explain but you sound so cute.

Tanya