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May 8, 2000

Hi everyone.

I haven't been around much here lately because of all the controversy, but now that it has died down you can expect to see me more often. Cat has been growing like a weed and she just hit the 16-month mark. School is winding down for the semester and I am only taking one class over the summer. You know it is really hard to go back, but for all the moms thinking of doing so -- go! I am doing much better this semester and I will be done two years from this month and no more living paycheck to paycheck. Life is not always easy for us, but we make do. We never have to go without necessities, but I can't have that new Porsche I had my eye on. All the struggle will be worth it one day. I try not to resent the mommies that have all the brand new things for their babies, but it is hard sometimes. I am just glad we have a decent home and a car with air conditioning.

Cat is doing so many new things. Her vocabulary is building little by little. The doctor is still worried that it is not larger, but she can count to three and say her ABCs through E. I think she will talk when she has something to say. Are any of your kids seriously into the Teletubbies? Cat drops everything when they come on. She does the same thing for Elmo. Her attention span for me is not half as long as it is for Elmo! She is also finally getting into being read to. Her daddy reads to her every night now. One night she brought him a book and it has been that way ever since. I hate to brag but she is really showing signs of high intelligence.

I was so distressed to see what happened on TT. If we hold onto prejudice than the world will never change. I was a victim of sexual abuse and I am doing everything I can to keep it from happening to Cat. She is my life and when people judge me by what I have done and not the person I am it makes me sad. Not sad for myself, but sad for the future. I am not going to get into the God issue, but one thing is for sure, I will love Cat for whatever she becomes doctor or nurse, homeless or wealthy, gay or straight. I won't care. I love others for who they are not what they are. I suggest some of you do the same.

I hope that all of you will get to know me.

Kahne