728x90
my iParenting
From Our Sponsors
e-newsletters
Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters

new terms of use
new privacy policy
award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Home › Diaries › Jenni › Introduction

Jenni's Diary Entries

Diary Navigation:

Introduction

January 2, 2004

A whole lot of nothing!

Wow there is a lot to update you on since I last wrote. Tom and I are semi getting along. There are some days I think I’m so lucky to be married to him and then there are days when I am so irritated with him I can’t even look at him. He is so angry about EVERYTHING these days, anything can set him off. Right now we are ignoring the baby issue, although he made it clear that he is done having kids. In my mind I am still going back and forth. Kelly (MT) just had a baby and Tanya (MT) thinks she is pregnant. One of my SIL’s just had a baby and the other is due in a few months. Thinking about them makes me want to have another. Then I look around my house and think about all the changes we would have to make and then I think I’m done. At least this is something I can think on for a while but I definatly need to make a decision in the next few years since I’m already 35!

We are also still disagreeing about the whole going back to work issue. I thought he realized that he was going to have to start finding clients for his voice over business but he still hasn’t done anything about it. When I’ve confronted him on this issue he says it costs money to send out demos. Well it cost us money to put his studio in the basement too, we’d have less of a loan payment if we wouldn’t have built that! We didn’t build it just so he could make spoofs on Christmas songs just for his own amusement. When we where talking about me going back to work again (yesterday, in fact) I explained to him why I couldn’t go back to work now. I explained those reasons in my last entry. Tom then decides that I can’t get anything now but when he goes to the day shift I can find something in the evenings so I can get out more! UUUGGGHHH! I like how I can’t get out more now just for sanity reasons but it will be okay then because I’ll be making money. He still doesn’t get it; I’m going to have to work FULL TIME just to bring in a few hundred dollars a month. Part of me would like to work a little because I can remember some of the fun times I had working but then I remember all the Bull Sh-t I had to put up with( Oh, I know it’s in every line of work!) and I don’t even want to bother. The other reason I’m not crazy about going back to work is I know I’ll have to work and deal with the messy house. If I want to be truly honest here, I really don’t want to work at all. I want to be a SAHM. My mom went back to work 5 years ago after being home for 30 because my brother was going to college and all it did was increase their debt instead of helping them pay for his loans. Only time will tell I guess.

Even though Tom has been stressed about the money situation he decided he wanted to have a holiday party with the neighbors. We invited 3 families plus two families from Kevin’s preschool. The two families from preschool didn’t come but our neighbors did. Everybody brought something but we still provided an appetizer, sub sandwiches and a dessert. We had a good time and Kevin and the one little boy played nice together. They all brought gifts for us and the kids, which we weren’t planning on but the way I figure it we had the party at our house. Another thing that happened before Christmas was that when Tom came home from work one night there was a car parked across the street from our house. Tom immediately knew something was up because there is no house directly across from us and no one ever parks there. When he got closer to our house someone ran off our front lawn, Tom followed him with the car and then the person motioned for Tom to stop. The guy said he was our neighbor and that he and his friend (who was with the car) were just playing a joke on us by “mounting” the two reindeer we have in front of our house. Tom told them to get of our property and he got their license plate number when they drove away. Tom then called his police department and had them run the plate. These guys, who were grown men by the way and not teenagers, do not live on our street, they live several streets away. Tom was going to go have a talk with them but I told him it would be better to have our town police do it. Then when the police came they went to our neighbors by mistake, it was eleven at night! The police told us they would make it crystal clear to these guys that they were to stay off our property. I keep thinking about what I would have done if I had gone in the living room and seen this guy out there messing with the reindeer, I would have freaked. As it was, I was in the kitchen completely oblivious to what was going on!

We had a nice Christmas. Kevin got completely spoiled. We had Tom’s parents over for Christmas Eve, since Tom’s sister and her parents aren’t getting along and Tom’s brother and wife just had a baby and they can’t seem to get their act together. It was nice just having his parents over. We had Ham, au gratin potatoes, broccoli, green bean casserole, rolls and brownie sundaes for dessert. They gave Kevin the Rescue Hero’s mission select mountain command center and a Barbie home set with Grandma and Grandpa Barbie dolls. Kevin had asked for a Barbie and Tom’s mom told him she would get him one. She kept her word but I don’t think Grandma and Grandpa Barbie’s are what Kevin had in mind ; ) Maxx got a Hokey Pokey Elmo and an Ocean Wonders fish bowl, and Maxx loves both of them. You should have seen him open the Elmo; it went off before it was unwrapped and Maxx couldn’t figure out where Elmo’s voice was coming from. All he could do was smile and hug Elmo when we got him out of the package. Tom’s parents stayed for the whole evening and helped put together and play with the new toys.

After Tom’s parents left and everything was cleaned up we waited until Kevin was sound asleep and we filled the stockings and put the gifts under the tree. Some were from us and others were from Santa. We tried not to put too much candy in the stockings so Kevin and Maxx got a few small books, toothbrushes, videos and a rescue hero each. Tom usually does my stocking and fills it with candy that I like and a few special things but this year he didn’t. I had a few things for his though, and a nice card. Maxx got up around 6:30 a.m. on Christmas morning so I had him fed before Kevin got up; in fact we had to wake Kevin up. It was getting late and we had to leave for my parent’s house around noon. Kevin couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw all the gifts but the thing he was most excited about was seeing the rescue hero he really wanted in his stocking. We are starting the tradition of the “pickle” ornament so we made Kevin find it since Maxx is too young. The person who finds the pickle gets an extra gift and gets to open his gifts first. Kevin got a Gamco classic video game player(it has Pac-man), Leap frog turbo twist, the leap frog Leapster, rescue heroes aqua command center, rescue hero robot, G.I Joe Doll, a view master micro scope, some leap pad books, some regular books, a dinosaur dig, and a tractor Lego set. Maxx got peek a blocks, a peek a blocks dump truck, Leap frog baby tad, a tractor book that is also a tractor toy, a water symphony bath toy, some books, flannel sheets, and a mega blocks teaching piano. Maxx wasn’t really interested in opening the gifts; he’d rip a little paper and then wander off or look at the tree. The kids and I got Tom clothes, policeman ornaments, and the Christmas Vacation DVD. I got books, some Elvis DVD’s, The Chocolate DVD, and Godiva chocolate. I had originally wanted an aquamarine ring but since it was a little more than our agreed upon amount I didn’t get it, which is a sore subject with me because I had gotten one for my birthday which I returned and never got anything else. We let the kids play and then had a quick breakfast before we had to head out to my parents house.

Tom came with us even though he had to work so he got to see everybody before had to go to work. Being at my parents was stressful. They had made a turkey but it didn’t turn out as good as the one on Thanksgiving. My Aunt and my SIL were arguing over how to make gravy and my parents have a very small kitchen so everyone was crammed together plus the kids all keep running through. It seems like no matter what Kevin does he gets yelled at. My brother has a daughter and they treat her like she’s made of glass so if Kevin looks at her wrong or breathes too hard he gets yelled at. I’m exaggerating of course but they yell at him a lot for doing “boy” things. My youngest brother is even worse with Kevin, it seems like he gets mad at everything Kevin does but what it really boils down to is that his girlfriend ends up playing with all the kids and my brother can’t share her. We ate around 1:30 and then after we cleaned up we open gifts. We still do a gift exchange with the adults in my family but we draw names. My mom had my name and because I never cashed my birthday check I had her use that money plus the amount of the gift and I got the ottoman that matches my loveseat in our loft. Tom got Scotch and Vodka, Kevin got a Basketball net, a wooden train that you build yourself, and a connect four game. Maxx got the Leapfrog shopping cart and some clothes. The kids and I stayed at my parents until early evening. Maxx was asleep when we got home so I let Kevin stay up and we put together some toys and played.

How much do you spend on your kids at Christmas? I never know what to do because I don’t have many good memories of Christmas as a child. We never actually celebrated Christmas on Christmas day because we always went out of town. Jingle the elf always brought our gifts early. I can never really remember getting anything I asked for either, my dad was in construction and in the 70’s work was scarce so there was never any money. I think that’s why I go over board now because I don’t want my kids to grow up feeling the way I did. I remember seeing kids after they came back for Christmas break and it always seemed like they all had tons of new clothes and talked about all the other stuff they had gotten.

So that was Christmas, now on to the rest. Before Christmas Kevin, Maxx and I got flu shots. Tom always gets one through work. I probably wouldn’t have done it but with all the horror stories you hear on the news I was getting scared. Kevin and Maxx both did very well. I did make Tom go with though, last time Kevin got a shot it took three people to hold him down. Kevin has been doing well on his Christmas break. He plays really well by himself so I am able to get things done and not have to constantly watch him. He is completely off a bedtime schedule, what little of one we have. It seems like no matter what time I get him down for bed he is always back out of bed; either he has to pee, we forgot to get him cold water, he forgot to tell us something, etc. He also loves to read/look at books, we are always removing books from his bed when we go to check on him before we go to bed. It’s a great thing but he really needs to learn to lay in bed and go to sleep when it’s time. I am also noticing how naturally smart Kevin is. I know that you shouldn’t compare your two children but it’s really hard not to. When Kevin was Maxx’s age he knew so many more things and I mean “just knew”. We hardly have to show him things once and he seems to pick right up on it. He really has an incredible memory; he remembers things out of the blue that happened 2-3 years ago! On the other hand his listening skills aren’t what they should be but do seem to be getting better. Kevin and I are a few pages away from being done with Hooked on Phonics level 1. We would have been done a while ago but I got a little lazy about it. So level 1 will have taken us about 18 months to complete, but he CAN read. When he wants to that is! LOL! Kevin is looking forward to going back to school (so am I) but he has been having fun playing with his new gifts. He’s already done the dinosaur excavation and put together the dinosaur he uncovered. That was a really cool thing but VERY messy! He really likes all his rescue heroes’ things and really likes the Pac man game thing. He was also really excited about the new Leap Pad books but now we are having problems with the Leap Pad, I called the company and they are sending me a new pen free of charge so hopefully that will fix the problem, otherwise it will cost $40 to get a new Leap Pad.

Maxx is having fun with his new toys too but his favorite toy is the little tyke’s tool box shape sorter he got for his birthday. He carries it around and wants us to sit with him while he tries to put the shapes in the different holes. His favorite Christmas gift has to be the Hokey Pokey Elmo; he loves to dance along with Elmo and tries to carry Elmo around. He also loves dinosaurs and carries a bunch of them around and makes growling noises. We keep some by his high chair and on the rare chance that Maxx isn’t eating we pretend that the dinosaurs are eating the food or we pick the food up with the dinosaurs and feed Maxx with them. Maxx can now climb up onto the sofa by himself and if for some reason he can’t get up he finds something to stand on to get himself where he wants to be. I hate these stages where they are learning these things and you can’t trust them to be on their own for a second. I keep Maxx penned in the family room while I’m doing something in the kitchen only to look up and see him waving to me over the back of the sofa. The problem is he doesn’t get that there is an edge that he can fall off of. Maxx is turning into quite the book lover also and he’s really picky about the books he likes. I’m glad though, I was worried that being the second child he wouldn’t get read to as much as Kevin. I’m still nursing him, although I feel like I’m not producing a lot of milk anymore. I must be producing some because he still wants it. Maxx still enjoys eating and will eat everything but scrambled eggs which he avoids. Not really saying much either, the only clear word he says is Dada but he does seem to say other things they are just not clear words and it’s not like he points to something and calls it by name. He still only has six teeth. I thought he might be teething with all the pooping he’s been doing but I don’t see anything in his mouth. Speaking of poop we’ve had huge incident, Maxx was sitting in his high chair sans pants and he pooped. Somehow the poop sneaked out the side of the diaper and into the highchair. I managed to get him upstairs to the tub without getting any on me but once in the tub it got all over the tub and all the toys. I rinsed Maxx off and took him out so I could clean the tub and the toys then got him all cleaned up. When I went to diaper him I noticed his little hiney looked red so I decided to put some zinc oxide on him, I got the stuff squeezed out of the tube and before I could smear the stuff with the diaper (I was trying to avoid using my hand because that stuff does not come off) Maxx had wiggled and stood up. So I’m thinking no big deal I’ll just pick him up and reposition him, but before I could do that he fell right on his butt and got the stuff all over the changing pad cover. I’m still thinking I can salvage the situation but then he manages to stand up and get both feet in the zinc oxide that was in the changing pad cover. I had to get something to put over the mess on the cover and get Maxx into a diaper and get it off his feet. Needless to day I ended up with zinc oxide all over me too. After I got Maxx to bed I had to sanitize highchair and the kitchen sink. I guess you had to be there!

We had a very quiet New Years. Tom had to work so it was just me and the kids. During the day my mom and I went to pick up the ottoman that she got me for Christmas and then we went to Wal-mart. When we got home we feed Maxx and put him to bed. Kevin and I watched George of the Jungle (Kevin’s pick) and ate junk food. We played with some Christmas toys and snuggled in bed until it was the New Year. I think he’s still a little two young to understand the concept but he seemed thrilled at the idea of getting to stay up that late. At midnight Tom called to wish us a Happy New year and then we looked out our bedroom window to find out what all the noise was and were surprised with a beautiful fireworks show that was coming from somewhere very close to us. Kevin fell asleep very shortly after that.

I have been doing fairly well despite all the stress in my marriage at the moment. Before Christmas I was actually exercising about a half hour each evening. That stopped when Tom had six days off in a row and then there were the holidays to deal with. I’m hoping to get back to my routine soon, probably after I get all these holiday decorations down and get the house back in order. There are a couple of health issues I have been worried about. Arthritis runs on my mom’s side of the family and now it has hit me. My mom has it in her hands pretty bad and in her feet. Over the summer a couple of my toes started bothering me and now with the colder weather and Maxx getting bigger and more wiggly my hands hurt so much! Mostly the area between my thumb and my index finger hurt so it makes it hard to pick Maxx up and to tie anything. My moms didn’t start bother in her until she was in her late forties but I think mine is hitting me earlier because of all the damage I did to my body when I had a bout with anorexia in high school. The other thing I started noticing more and more when I was pregnant with Maxx but kind of wrote it off as pregnancy brain. I notice when I’m talking I’m thinking about what I am saying but what I end up saying is not what I was thinking. For example I was trying to tell Kevin to take off his coat but each time I told him I would tell him to take off his shoes. My mom’s aunt died of MS and I’ve always been afraid I would develop it. On a more positive note I received a letter in the mail about an alumni concert for the junior high band I was in. The director is retiring this year so they are trying to get together as many alumni as they can to perform a piece they’ve commissioned which will include a lot of the pieces the band has performed over the years. This means I will have to get out my flute/piccolo and start practicing! This will also be a great way to reconnect with a lot of the people I lost touch with and to do it on a level that will be more comfortable than a high school reunion. This may also be an incentive for me to loose this extra fifteen pounds. I also ran into a girl that I went to junior high and high school with when I was a t the grocery store in my home town. We were friends mostly in junior high and kind of lost touch in high school. She and I had a great time catching up and we exchanged number and e-mails and have been writing e-mails back and forth. It will be nice getting to know her again. On a sad note she has been diagnosed with systemic lupus and is not feeling well a lot of the time.

Do you make New Years resolutions? I try not to because it seems like I can never follow through with them. My HOPES for the New Year are to loose some weight (hopefully before vacation, which is in two months, EEK!), make a budget and stick to it, and spend more time with my kids and less time on the internet.

Happy New Year everyone! Thank you for reading,
Jenni, Kevin and Maxx

What we are reading:
Maxx- Teletubbies, the Magic string, Teletubbies The Little Puffy Cloud, Stop Train Stop by Rev. W. Awdry, and Hand, Hand, Fingers, Thumb by Al Perkins

Kevin- Goldilocks Returns by Lisa Campbell Ernst, The Wolf Who Cried Boy by Bob Hartman, and Kate and The Beanstalk by Mary Pope Osborne

Jenni- Royal Duty by Paul Burrell

P.S. There isn’t really anything new on my niece’s situation. My SIL sent out a Christmas picture portraying the perfect family. I’ll post it on one of the kid’s websites along with some of our Christmas pictures. I’ll post links when I get them up.

P.P.S Sorry for all the little details, especially about the gifts. I'm keeping track so when Kevin and Maxx say they never got anything or didn't like what they got I can whip this out and show them!




previous diarynext diary



 
want to keep a diary on iParenting?
Authoring a diary on the iParenting network allows you to chronicle your family's story, preserving it for years to come. It's also a great way to get the most out of the iParenting community.   Click here to start...