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Jen's Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 11/19/00 -------------------- 11/14/00 10/30/00 10/24/00 10/18/00 10/11/00 10/10/00 10/3/00 9/20/00 9/13/00 9/5/00 8/22/00 8/15/00 8/1/00 7/24/00 7/17/00 7/11/00 7/5/00 6/26/00 6/19/00 6/12/00 6/5/00 5/15/00 5/10/00 5/1/00 4/25/00 4/19/00 4/10/00 4/4/00 3/29/00 3/20/00 3/14/00 3/6/00 2/29/00 2/22/00 2/15/00 2/8/00 2/2/00 2/1/00 1/26/00 1/12/00 1/4/00 12/29/99 12/20/99 11/29/99 11/17/99 11/8/99 10/27/99 10/26/99 10/18/99 10/13/99 10/7/99 9/29/99 9/22/99 9/13/99 9/7/99 9/1/99 8/31/99 8/17/99 8/10/99 -------------------- Jen's Introduction

September 1, 1999

I've been thinking a lot about working outside of the home as well as being a mother, and in some ways it's an interesting situation. Certainly many people have very strong opinions about the matter, judging from some of the messages I've seen on other people's boards (especially in the pregnancy diaries). It makes me wonder why people think that there is only one right way to live. Perhaps they just feel threatened that someone would chose to live differently than they do. Maybe some think because I choose to hold an office job, that I devalue those who have chosen to stay home full-time with their children. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I enjoy both the jobs that I have, being a mother and an Internet publisher, and I find value and fulfillment from both. My son in is daycare with a woman who adores him and has known him since the moment he was born (she was one of my labor coaches). When he is dropped off, he often reaches for her, and he is a very happy little boy. In the mornings, evenings, and weekends we play, read stories, take walks and just spend time together.

In his daycare situation, he is learning some sign language (he can sign for "please," "more," "finished"), he gets to play with other kids (other parents have told me that their child gives them a "Jason-report" everyday), and has access to activities that I would not be able to provide for him even if I were at home full-time.

Now, granted, I have a pretty ideal day-care situation, so I don't have to deal with some of the issues that many moms do, but still the fact remains that I am not with my child all the time. You know what? This doesn't make me a bad mother. On the contrary, I think I am a pretty darn good mother. My child is adored; he's fed well, clothed well, and is a pretty easy-going child. If I ever saw that he might be having problems, you'd better believe I would do everything in my power to change the situation. He's happy, I'm happy, his father is happy -- why would anyone think that this is a bad thing?

Do I think that staying home with your children is somehow inferior? Certainly not-- there are many advantages with that situation, and for those who want to do it, it can be the most amazing experience of all. But I don't feel cheated that it's not my experience. I'm having a rewarding one, too, with a completely different set of pros and cons. I'm not working outside of the home because I couldn't "cut it" as a stay at home mom, I'm doing this because I believe that this is the best scenario for my family, end of story.

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