Heather R.'s Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 11/30/01 -------------------- 10/25/01 6/21/01 5/10/01 4/8/01 3/30/01 3/23/01 3/15/01 3/7/01 2/27/01 2/20/01 2/12/01 1/29/01 1/17/01 1/1/01 12/27/00 12/19/00 12/1/00 11/13/00 -------------------- Heather R.'s Introduction

April 8, 2001

This weekend marked the end of an era – a reign whose demise had been long in coming, but whose exact departure date was previously unknown. I’m talking, of course, about Chloe’s pacifier, aka “nukey”. The week before John and I had decided that the time had come. Chloe’s pacifier had to go. It seemed a bit cruel to take it from her – after all, one nukey or another had graced Chloe’s hand or mouth or pocket since she was but a few weeks old. How would she take to the absence of her constant companion?

To ease the blow, John and I came upon an ingenious idea: we would hold a “Good-Bye Nukey” party for her to commemorate her final passage from the world of babyhood. It would be a chance for us to celebrate Chloe’s growing independence, and it would give Chloe something tangible to remember when she wanted her pacifier.

So, this morning, Chloe got her “Good-Bye Nukey” gift – a backpack with a camping/tea set. It was a huge hit with her and Ivan both. Chloe also received several balloons, including a giant ladybug balloon.

After the morning festivities, we headed out to Multnomah Falls, about 30 minutes outside of town. Multnomah Falls are beautiful, and I believe the most visited place in Oregon. The first fall comes off of Larch mountain, and falls about 540 feet into a gorgeous pool, which then cascades down the second portion of the fall another 80 feet or so. A bridge crosses over the middle pool, between the two falls, and we walked the short trail up to feel the misty spray hit our faces. Chloe and Ivan both loved the falls.

The day will be topped off with Chloe’s favorite dinner (chicken and mashed potatoes with asparagus), and a chocolate cake, frosted like a sunflower.

All day, Chloe has gone without her pacifier (and a good deal yesterday and the day before, sort of like preparation for today). Whenever she has asked for it, we’ve told her that today is her good-bye party, and that it means she’s a big girl. Last night she even went to bed without her pacifier, and only cried lightly for three or four minutes before going to sleep.

In some ways, each of my children’s new conquests invokes a feeling of sadness in me, and the relinquishing of Chloe’s pacifier does the same. It was a silly habit, a nuisance to us and Chloe, and still, with each new step and advancement, I am reminded that my purpose is to see to it that Chloe and Ivan will someday no longer need me. The only way to do it well, I believe, is to have such a well of emotion that their creeping independence is both painful and exhilarating to watch. How ironic that the proof of my success will be Chloe’s and Ivan’s eventual departure from us.

-heather