Dawn's Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 7/28/01 -------------------- 7/17/01 7/8/01 7/2/01 6/25/01 6/20/01 6/18/01 -------------------- Dawn's Introduction

June 20, 2001

Hello!

Well, earlier today I tried writing an entry from work but when I went to submit it, my Netscape hung and then crashed, and my entry was lost. I suppose that's what I deserve considering I was writing my entry from work and I probably should have been working... So now I'm home typing in my third entry in three days. Can you tell I'm excited about keeping this diary?! :)

Since I didn't keep a pregnancy or baby diary, you're all just jumping into the second year of Jake's life. I tried to keep my intro generic (and hence it came out pretty boring...) so now I'll share some more specifics with you. I'm doing this in kind of a random order so I apologize in advance for jumping around a bit.

First, a little bit about Jake's personality. Jake is happy, fun loving, and extremely laid back. When he was first born, the nurses wanted him to cry and he refused. All he would do was whine. That's kind of the way he still is - very easy going. I wish I could take credit for his agreeable nature, but he's been that way all along so I can only blame it on superior genetics. Ha! (Actually, that might be at least partially true since Mark and I also tend to be quite laid back about most things and, while we're both highly opinionated, neither of us is stubborn.)

Despite his easy going nature, Jake is still a toddler, and being a toddler, he tends to test us. If we say "no" to something (and we really try to pick our battles so if we say no, we mean it), Jake will go back to the forbidden activity or object over and over and over again, just to make sure we say no each and every time. It's my job to set fair and consistent limits, but it sure does get exhausting to keep saying no and attempting to distract him!

Jake's also friendly and out going, though he does sometimes need a little time to warm up to someone. And he's not easily frightened. If he's unsure about a situation, he is immensely reassured simply by holding my hand - now that's a wonderful feeling!!! If I act comfortable with a person or situation, then Jake too will quickly be comfortable himself.

That said, we've recently been struggling with a bout of separation anxiety. The anxiety seems to have waned recently, thank God, but Jake is still quite a Momma's boy. There are times when I can't cook or clean because he's clinging to my ankles and refuses to play with his Daddy. It can be frustrating, but I'm also trying to relish being the center of his world. In another 12 or 13 years, he'll probably refuse to acknowledge that knows me! :(

Now for some random details about Mark and me... As I said in my intro, we met in graduate school at the College of William and Mary in Williamsburg. We both hold MS degrees in computer science from W&M. Mark is currently working on his Ph.D. and he should be done by December. I can hardly wait until he's finished!! I really want him to get his degree and most of the time I try to be supportive about it, but when the weekend comes, it's so hard for me not to try to distract him so he'll play with Jake and me!

Aside from the Ph.D., it seems like we keep busy these days because we bought a new house in September. I thought buying a new house (it was brand new when we moved in) would mean we'd have less maintenance. Boy was I ever wrong about that. We always seem to have projects in an attempt to get our house "just so". With the arrival of summer, we've been spending lots of time working outside, which I enjoy far more than I ever thought possible. Sometimes I moan that we'll never be done, but most of the time, I look forward to the next project!

We own a 5 year old English bulldog named Max. Max is a slobbery, shedding mess. He is trying his hardest to ruin my new house. That said, I can't imagine a better dog with children. Max is huge and (to some people) looks vicious. 200 pound grown men are afraid of him. And yet Max and Jake play as if they're brothers. (I suppose in a way they are...) I trust that Max would not intentionally hurt Jake; in fact, I'm constantly amazed by what Max puts up with from Jacob. I often complain about Max's messes, but when I see how much Jake enjoys Max - and that Max seems to return the feeling - it makes it all worthwhile.

I write computer software for NASA's flight simulators. (I don't work directly for NASA though, rather I'm an on-site contractor.) My Dad is a pilot, and I seem to have inherited his love of all things aeronautical. My job is perfect for me. Even better now that Jake has arrived, my job is also extremely flexible. It doesn't matter when I work, as long as I get my 24 hours in each week.

while I work, Jake stays with his godmother, Collen. I knew her before Mark and I ever even got married. She has a son in college and two daughters in high school. If you could meet her children, you'd immediately think they are a testament to what a fine mother she is. I can't imagine trusting anyone else (not even my own mother) with Jake the way I trust her. I can't speak highly enough about her. She is fabulous and she loves him like her own.

In addition to watching Jake 3 days a week, Colleen also watches a 3 year old little girl 2 days a week. I like that because for those two days, Jake gets to play with another child. For the third day, Jake gets Colleen's undivided attention.

Mark and I had wanted Jake and his future brother and sister to be about 18 months apart. So, in accord with our grand plan, I got pregnant in December. Unfortunately, I miscarried in February. Apparently God has other plans for us because it's been almost 5 months since the miscarriage and I'm still not pregnant. I struggle with the fact that when we conceive really is out of our hands. I have to keep reminding myself that God really does have a plan and everything will unfold exactly as it should. I also tell myself that you can't rush perfection. :)

Our pediatrician told us it isn't always a good thing when your firstborn is as laid back and happy as Jake because it sets up very high and unreasonable expectations for subsequent children. Mark likes to say that Jake's temperament is a result of our great parenting. I say we'll see when we have another child... I swear Jake is the sum of all that is good in Mark and me; that doesn't leave much left for our next kid! :)

Current events in our lives...

Jake and I are enrolled in a "baby and me" swim class. The point of this class is to get the toddlers used to the water and to get the parents used to the kids in the water. We're halfway through the 4 week class (it meets twice a week). At first Jake seemed skeptical about it, but he's definitely starting to enjoy the pool. Even better, he's getting braver and more confident. I used to think he was ignoring everything we did in class, but then he started "practicing" his skills in the bathtub. So he's obviously paying attention even when he pretends he's not looking at me!

Last night, for the first time, Jake peed in the toilet! Jake always pees in the tub, so for the past 2 weeks, we've been putting him on the toilet before we put him into the tub. Jake tolerates this, especially if we read his "flush the potty" book while he's sitting. Last night, we apparently timed it right because Jake peed! Mark and I immediately praised Jake. Unfortunately, our praise startled the poor boy and he cut off mid-stream. Then we sat there staring at Jake's penis waiting for him to pee again. We subject our child to such humiliating experiences!!

Jake has also started squatting under our kitchen table whenever he needs to poop. I haven't yet grabbed him in the act and put him on the toilet. I'm afraid he wouldn't understand what I was trying to do. At the same time, he obviously knows when he has the urge because he heads for the table. We know he's pooping when he hides under there...

Part of the problem is that Jake lacks the communication skills to tell us he has to go. He's only recently begun to say words. Even then, it seems like he'll say something for a week or so and then mysteriously forget that word and move onto something else. I've talked with some friends and we came to the conclusion that boys tends to talk later than girls. We also decided that this lag in communication continues well into adulthood!! I feel a little deficient sometimes because Jake's babysitter seems to understand what he's saying better than I do...

Jake's been walking since before he was 10 months old. Lately he's decided that he loves climbing. And he'll try to scale just about anything, including a bare wall. I'm beginning to suspect he thinks he's spiderman!

We're going to New Jersey this weekend for a surprise 80th birthday party for my Grandpop. Actually, we're having a whirlwind grandparent tour... On Friday, we're driving to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania to Mark's parents house. That night we're having a cookout with Mark's parents and 3 of his grandparents. On Saturday we're driving from Harrisburg to Trenton, NJ for the party. (It's for my Mom's Dad.) Sunday morning we're going to have breakfast with my grandmother (my Dad's Mom) before driving back to Harrisburg for lunch with Mark's parents.

I am really, really looking forward to the birthday party Saturday. Actually, I'm just looking forward to getting away because we haven't been on a trip since Thanksgiving! Plus, my Mom (my folks live in upstate NY) will be there along with her brothers. My Mom's two brothers are SO much fun. We'll also get to see other relatives we rarely see, and I always love the opportunity to show Jake off! Unfortunately, my Dad won't be able to join us since he'll be on a trip (he's an airline pilot). (Speaking of my Dad, if you're interested visit www.askcaptaintom.com which is my Father's Day present to him.)

So I think that just about brings you up to speed on events at our household. I hope I haven't bored anyone too much... Maybe I should have warned you to grab a cup of coffee!

Dawn