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October 13, 2003
Halloween
We wrapped up this Halloween season with no less then three Halloween parties. The first was sponsored by my town’s parent group, and featured a singer that I was not all that impressed with, and neither was Ella. They touted the event as a party, and that’s what I told Ella she was going to, so we were both disappointed when we showed up and there was nothing to do but listen to the singer. I was hoping for some cute little games, some food, some socializing… ah, well. The second was a pumpkin carving party at my friend Kristian’s house. This was much more fun for me and, while Ella was playing shy most of the time and didn’t want to help me pull goop from inside the pumpkin, this was the party in which she discovered the joy of M&M’s, which she called beans until we named them for her.
The third was on Halloween, and it was our neighborhood party, which is the biggest ‘kid event’ sponsored of the year by the neighborhood association, and, as in past years, is pretty much a zoo. It is held in the basement of the church next door to me and brings out tons of kids that pretty much packs the place. This year they had a storyteller, but Ella wasn’t much interested in him and so we didn’t listen to him much. Instead we ate pizza, socialized a bit, and I spent one final hour going over the intricacies of trick or treating with Ella.
I have to admit, I wasn’t expecting too much from her in this department. At all three parties, as well as almost all events I take her to, she was very shy and clingy with me for the first 5-30 minutes. After that she was able to relax and enjoy herself but I didn’t think we would ever get beyond the clingy stage within the minute or so you spend at a person’s door when trick or treating. Boy was I wrong! I think the big difference was that she really started to get the concept of free candy, as well as just figuring out what candy was, and how good it tasted. The first house she managed to croak out trick or treat but had no problems at all when it came to picking out the candy and putting it into her little pumpkin bag. By the third house she could promptly chirp out “Trick or treat” “Thank you” and “Happy Holloween” and would immediately tell me, upon closing the door “Wanna do annonner house… dat one!!!” running down the sidewalk as fast as her flashing red sneakers would take her. I had originally hoped she would hold up for our three neighbors but we ended up circling a number of blocks before I insisted that we had enough. People were very generous and by the end of the night that bag was probably half of Ella’s weight.
I’ve mentioned before that Ella hasn’t had a lot of candy in her life until now. Well, boy has she caught on fast! The last few weeks have been filled with the refrain of “I want candy… I wanna… EAT IT!” Without being a total Grinch, I have tried to limit her to two pieces a day (although I have to admit, the first one is usually in the morning). Meanwhile, Jamie was helping to lighten the load every chance he got so now, two weeks later, the pumpkin is (finally) bare.
Trouble with Time Outs
I’ve been having trouble trying to figure out discipline with Ella. Fortunately this is not a huge issue since she has, for the most part, continued to be fairly easy going and mindful. But she is two after all, and so there is definitely the requisite periods of testing limits and practicing defiance. Usually I just take away whatever she is doing wrong (the crayon if she is coloring on the desk, the dog food if she is scattering it) or remove her from a situation (climbing on chair backwards), both times telling her why she is losing the priviledge, but there are also times that I feel are appropriate for the dreaded TIME OUT. After a warning I will scoop her up, plunk her in the chair and tell her she is being punished.
Sounds good to me, right? Straight out of all sorts of ‘how to parent a toddler’ advice guides. The problem? SHE JUST DOESN’T CARE. If I don’t physically hold her down she will just jump off the chair and run away and when I hold her she laughs and squirms around the whole time. Telling her she has a longer time out coming makes no difference. The other day we were going through this when Jamie came home and she cheerfully called out to him “Daddy! I in time out because I wasn’t listening!”. Ug—doesn’t sound very repentant to me! How do I get one of those sad quivery mouthed little moppets that skulk off to their time outs like a guilty puppy?
Well, I guess I am going to post this entry, although it’s a little short and not too exciting, since it’s been a few weeks and I don’t know when I’ll have any time to write much else any time soon. I am in the final stretch with my first semester of classes before winter break (WA-HOO! I feel like such a kid waiting for vacation) and with the holidays things are picking up fast all over.
As always, thanks for reading.
Bonnie
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