 | Diary Navigation:
|
September 3, 2003
How naked is too naked
Ella has been spending a lot of time in the backyard pool lately and a good percentage of that time is spent naked. I let her do this for a number of reasons. For one thing, I like her air to get fresh air as it cuts down on her diaper rash. I also can tell exactly when she is peeing, and then we can talk about it and label it, which I hope will help her with potty training (it is already very obvious when she is pooping but not so much when she is peeing with the diaper on). There is also, I will admit, some amount of laziness in the naked decision, especially when I know it will be a short dip in the kiddy pool and I don’t want to go through the whole swim diaper/bathing suit rigamarol for ten minutes of activity. Plus I want Ella to know her body is nothing to be ashamed of and that it is great to spend time wild and free from the constraint of clothing. And finally, of course, I just love her little naked body and love to watch her, so happy and free and beautiful as she frolics in her birthday suit.
So there really has never been any questioning on my part in the past as to whether I am doing something ‘wrong’ by indulging in these back yard naked-fests. Lately, however, as I notice that she is becoming more and more kid and less and less baby, I have been looking suspiciously at the neighbors windows and wondering if our naked days will have to end sooner rather then later. This would make me very sad. But although our yard has a big fence around it that cannot be seen by passersby’s, there are a number of houses close to ours that have a very clear view into the yard from their upper windows. And these days you hear the terrible stories and, while I hate to think I would let my life or actions be ruled by fear or paranoia, I would hate even more to think that someone could be looking at a beautiful naked little toddler and thinking anything but pure sweet thoughts.
So, while I doubt our actions will change much this summer, it will probably be our last season of outdoor nudity. And, while in the past I have felt very comfortable changing Ella in the middle of the action at a beach or a neighbors house, I think this will also soon be confined to the (safe?) privacy of closed in walls and shut doors. And it is too bad, but the horrible thought of other consequences is far worse.
Also, although I hope to allow Ella to run around in the house nude for as long as she wants, I think that Jamie and my days may be limited/over. Not that we are exactly nudists but we aren’t fanatical about covering up when we come out of the shower or are getting dressed and Ella is usually around. Lately, however, she’s been very interested in our privates, to the point that I think she must be able to tell they aren’t exactly like other body parts. Over and over she will ask Jamie “What’s that” and, um, tried to touch it (he doesn’t let her). She also watches me and will point and ask and, NOT that I let her touch it but I am a little more free/ casual (even if I’m freaking out inside) about trying to talk about what’s going on down there. And I can only be so private when she is in the bathroom with me nearly EVERY time (was there a time when I valued my privacy? I can’t remember what life was like then).
I am curious as to other’s opinions as to how much skin is appropriate to show. For instance, to what age would you let your daughter run around an enclosed backyard with visibility only by the neighbors? Would it be different if it was a boy? What about changing into swimsuit at the beach? What is the cut off for this little flash of nudity, would you say?
Making progress?
On a nicer note, recently during one of these back yard play sessions, Ella came across a (how shall I put this nicely?) recent pile of waste left by Coco. She stared at the dog poop for a while, longer then she usually does since she knows exactly what it is, and then announces to me “I wanna make a Ella poop!” Well, I was just thrilled to hear this but not in her current state (see above paragraph) so I whipped her inside and gave the option of a diaper or the potty, to which she chose the latter. Ever the cautious optimist, we sat down, got out some reading material, and went to work. She grunted and strained but it was all for naught. Despite her insistence that she had, indeed done ‘A big Ella poop” the potty was clean and we will leave this milestone for another day. But it’s progress, right?
Drowning in clothing
Am I the only one that has fallen victim to the great tide of toddler clothes that befalls a toddler? Ever since Ella’s birth I have happily shifted my clothing shopping sprees from myself to my daughter. Let’s face it—the clothes are cuter, cheaper, no trying on required, plus she needed a whole new wardrobe nearly every three months. Happily and guiltlessly I went from Baby Gap to Children’s Place and every store in between. The problem is, in the last year or so her growing has slowed WAY down but my purchases haven’t. Right now she is still fitting into nearly all of her 18 month clothing that she has worn since her first birthday. I usually buy a size bigger then she is currently wearing and as a result her dressers are popping with 24month/2T clothes. Add to this that we have three very generous sources of absolutely adorable hand me downs and I don’t know how this girl is going to wear all of this. It is torture to me to turn down all these cute end of season sales but I have been doing my best.
Language
Well, I feel like I say this every time but Ella’s language is just amazing. I guess I could basically say that she ‘talks’ now as she really is capable of carrying on a conversation, answering questions, listening and answering in full sentences that are fully understandable (to me anyway, and to others usually). She has nearly got the whole concept of “I” “Me” and “You” down, although sometimes she will stammer through a sentence as she tried to work it out “Mama, take I…. Ella… me out of your… my… Ella crib” The only thing she drops are prepositions (I think they are prepositions, it’s been a while since we did this in English) like ‘am’ (I going upstairs) but otherwise she is really off and going. She still likes to talk in baby talk sometimes though, like if she is upset she will complain “Waa.. waa… waa…” or if she is happy she will sometimes launch into “Da dee da dee da”.
Party time
Plans for Ella’s birthday are coming together nicely. We had originally thought we would have a fairly small family-only time. Well, I guess Jamie’s family decided this would be a good excuse to come in from out of town and have a good old reunion so the party is now more like a large family party. My poor mother and Mike will probably be the only ones’s from my side but I think there will be about 15 from Jamie’s side. More then we expected, but it should be fun.
I have a few comments to make about party planning, as I have been focusing in this area and a few things that are very disturbing to me have come to lite. The first is that party supplies are a BIG RIP OFF. The first time I saw eight paper cups being sold for $2.89 I nearly choked—and this was at a place that was supposed to be discount (Buck-a-Book). Perusing the party stores, which include such incredibly stupid offerings as eight packs of plates (who in the world ever needs only eight paper plates—just another scam to get you to buy two, three, four or more of these overpriced rip offs) and six packs of balloons (similarly ridiculous) I realized that these prices are standard, despite the fact that every grocery store or pharmacy has perfectly good paper plates sold by the hundreds for less money.
The other thing that has ticked me off is the seemingly complete monopoly all of the television shows seem to have on themed birthday parties. Now, I will not claim to be someone who eschews all television and Ella is more then aware of all the Seseme Street Characters, Dora the Explorer, Miffy, and Blue’s Clues, and it is fine with me if someone chooses to make one of these a theme for a party. The problem comes when one chooses NOT to and is left with virtually no choices for serving wear and decorations. This frustration came to a head when I flipped through over thirty designs for birthday cakes at the local grocery store and EVERY SINGLE ONE was some commercial character—from Elmo to Scooby Doo to the Incredible Hulk. I had originally thought a Lady Bug theme would be cute for the party but forget that—if you aren’t going commercial it seems your choices are “Happy Birthday” or… um… “Happy Birthday” (gender neutral, mind you, there isn’t even two different patterns for boys vs. girls partys). Want to know the theme of our party? Why, it’s Happy Birthday!
Well, I think that this rant is a good way to end things, now that I’ve gotten myself all worked…
As always, thanks for reading.
Bonnie
 |  |
|
want to keep a diary on iParenting?
Authoring a diary on the iParenting network allows you to chronicle your family's story, preserving it for years to come. It's also a great way to get the most out of the iParenting community. Click here to start...
|
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families. 
