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Ch-ch-ch-changes

November 13, 2006

The first change, as you can see from this photo, is that I cut all of my hair off.  Working three jobs (at the time-- I'm back to two!), taking three graduate classes, and doing mommy stuff is not conducive to long showers or time to style my hair.  I was pony-tailing it all the time.  I was able, through a free haircut at Great Clips, to donate my ponytail to Locks of Love.  Somewhere a child who needs hair is wearing mine!  It's much easier, and I feel very free without it.  Of course, fall is NOT the time to do it if one wants one's neck warm...

The second change is that I'm taking more time for myself; I'm not just asserting that I need time to do my work (there's never enough), but I'm working out more and going to church weekly.  Cai even likes the nursery, when I can peel him off me and sneak out.  My husband is Jewish, and has never wanted to share that side of himself with me, although I asked a number of times.  Aside from Cai's baptisms, he was not interested in going to church with me, either.  Until recently, he's actually been fairly derogatory of Christianity as a whole and Catholicism in particular.  I've really missed following faith as a family, especially since it's difficult to do church with a little one alone.  The church Cai and I have been attending is a non-denominational Christian church in the neighborhood where some friends we do playdates with go.  It's very family friendly, unlike the oddly family-unfriendly Catholic church up the street.  It feels like home. 

Speaking of home, I'm re-arranging, too.  I got a used computer armoire from craigslist.org so that Cai would no longer be tempted to stick his toothbrush in my A: Drive.  I got a new-ish full sized bed, also from craigslist, and treated myself to olive & sage sheets, a comfortor, and the most delicious courderoy quilt to go with them. 

That brings me to my biggest change.  I am no longer married.  Or at least I won't be soon.  Ben and I stopped sharing a bedroom over the summer (so much for a room for the "next baby" anyway, right?), and things degenerated until I asked him for a divorce.  I hate this, but when he went away for a weekend fishing trip I realized I didn't want him to come back.  He is moving out in December after he finds a job and gets a car, and hopefully he will live close by.  I want him to be as involved with Cai as he can be.  Marry in haste, repent in leisure... that's the saying, right?  It turns out that opposites may attract, but that it's not necessarily something to build a marriage on.  So many cliche's, so little marriage...  I love him, and I cannot imagine living without him in the house, but I have been living as a non-entity to him since I got pregnant, and I finally realized that I deserve someone who thinks of me, and who wants to do things as a family, not someone who sees family as a time-management issue.  Whatever other issues he may have, he's a great dad, and I hope he will remain that way.

Anyway, that's my list of surprises this week.  What's going on in your worlds?