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Home › Articles › Toilet Training › Toddlers Afraid of Public Restrooms

Toddlers Afraid of Public Restrooms

Tips to Handle Toddlers Who Are Scared of Public Toilets

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"My little one recently potty trained and she does a wonderful job while we are at home. When we are out, it's a different story. She almost panics when she feels the urge and she refuses to use the public restroom. How can I help her get over this fear?"

Try to get a sense about what is making your daughter afraid, advises Keath Castelloe Low, a child and adolescent psychologist and mother of four from North Carolina. "Some children are terrified of the loud flushing sound of public toilets," she says. "The automatic flush is even worse because the children often feel they have no control of when the toilet is going to flush, sucking all the water down with a loud 'whoosh.'"

Some children have fears about being sucked into the toilet themselves. "Their fears are exacerbated in these public restrooms because of the more powerful flush," says Low. "Often the toilet seats are larger, as well, making kids feel fears about falling in. Some kids just don't like the unfamiliarity of the public bathroom with confining stalls, large toilets and strangers coming in and out."

The most important thing for you to do is to remain loving, patient and reassuring, says Low. "Empathize with her and let her know you understand," she says. "Proceed slowly and listen to her cues. If she is not ready to use public toilets yet, allow her to wear a Pull-Up on outings."

If your daughter feels comfortable, Low says to have her come into a public bathroom with you as you use the toilet. "Remain upbeat and positive," she says. "Your comforting, 'no pressure' attitude will help her feel more at ease. After you have finished, wait to flush until she is standing by the sink further away from the toilet. Give her a flush warning or better yet let her say 'go' when she is ready for you to flush. If the flush is automatic show her how you can hold your hand over the sensor to control when it will flush."


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