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Recognizing the Urge
Helping Your Child Know When It's Time to Go
By Kelly D. Burgess
t's also important, notes Welch, for children to be monitored for their urges often enough to determine that they're not trying to hold their urine or bowel movements in order to please their parent or caregiver. In other words, praise them for going on the potty but not necessarily for staying dry or clean.
"Holding it" can lead to urinary tract infections (especially in girls) and other problems. Instead, watch your child carefully for the signals he exhibits that indicate he has to go, make a mental note of times when you know your child is likely to have a bowel movement or urinate (such as after meals or snacks) and make frequent trips to the potty chair. Catching your child when she has the urge is the best way to help her realize she has control over her bodily functions.
One thing Welch knows as an expert and Hohlbaum knows from her expert "mom" experience is that children need to be mature enough to understand what their bodies are trying to tell them. If they aren't, all the role-modeling and encouragement in the world aren't going to help with training.
"The biggest issue with toilet training is just waiting until the child is actually ready so they truly recognize what's going on and it's not just the parents that are trained," says Welch. "Also, get your caregiver and anyone else who is involved with your children to approach potty training the way you do, so there's consistency for the child."
From there, gentle encouragement and reinforcement are the keys to stress-free training. Welch suggests using a small potty chair rathe than one that attaches to the big toilet. She says children seem to like the stability of having their feet on the floor.