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All About Sharing
An Excerpt
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Perfect Parenting and Kid Cooperation
Question: My child has a difficult time sharing. She's very possessive about her toys and belongings. But that's just the beginning! She doesn't even like to share the swings at the park, her seat on the bus, or "her" patch of sand on the beach! How can I get her to share?
Think about it: When you're a little kid, nothing really belongs to you. Sure, you may get a baton for your birthday, but when you hit your brother with it, your father takes it away. It may be your favorite sweater, but when you grow out of it, your mother gives it to your little cousin. It may be your special swing at the park, but when you arrive and a big kid is abusing it, your babysitter tells you to wait your turn. You may start to believe that you have to keep all your important things hidden away to keep them safe from loss.
Practice: Set up non-threatening situations that lend themselves to sharing so that your child has practice sharing her belongings for a short period of time. A few examples are: games that require two people, such as badminton or checkers, puzzles where everyone is making the same thing, crafts where children are sharing supplies, coloring with one set of crayons or markers, or building a Lego city.
Explain your expectations: Let your child know exactly what to expect prior to a sharing situation. For example, before a friend's visit let her know how long the friend will be there, and reassure her that all her things will still be hers after the friend leaves. Allow your child to put away a few favorite things that do not have to be shared, but let her know that the guest will be playing with the other toys during the visit.