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Home › Articles › Holiday: Winter › Managing Holiday Madness

Managing Holiday Madness

Sanity Strategies for Parents

By Mark Stackpole

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Simma Lieberman of Albany, Calif., is a consultant and speaker specializing in diversity and cross-cultural communication. She believes that families can enjoy the holidays more by acknowledging the obstacles ahead of time.

"Accept the fact that if you want to do anything festive, you can't worry about keeping a schedule," Lieberman says. "You'll only stress you and your toddler out. You'll be a nervous, short-tempered wreck, which will make your child anxious." If your toddler does get anxious, Lieberman recommends spending some time with him before and after an event, rubbing his back or making a game of taking long, relaxing deep breaths. It is a technique she used with her own son to help him come down from "bouncing off the walls."

Lieberman recommends determining what it is that you really need to get done and how you are going to do it. "Parents with toddlers need to decide if they are going to celebrate, attend events, visit people," she says. "If you need a babysitter to go on a shopping trip or attend a dinner party, make sure those arrangements are made well in advance. Shopping during naps is especially good, as it takes the stress off of the shopper, the baby and the relative who agrees to stay home so you can go out. If you are hosting family rather than visiting them, consider buying food rather than cooking it yourself. Decorate your table, but remember to leave out some ribbons, extra decorations or other things so that the toddlers can play and stay occupied.

Your family's holiday traditions o not need to include frustration, emotional meltdowns and anxiety, though there will always be a little of that. The sooner you accept it, the sooner you can move on to actually having some fun. Your toddler is counting on you to keep your cool so that she can keep hers. It will take a little bit of flexibility, a little bit of planning and a little bit of help, and there still might not be very many silent nights. But so what? Take a deep breath and give yourself the gift of sanity.


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