728x90
my iParenting
From Our Sponsors
e-newsletters
Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters

new terms of use
new privacy policy
award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Home › Articles › Discipline › Arguing and Back-Talk

Arguing and Back-Talk

Excerpted from Perfect Parenting by Elizabeth Pantley

Pages:  1  2  3  

Question: I know my kid's going to grow up to be a lawyer! He argues whenever he's asked to do something. He debates his rights when he's asked to stop doing something. He pleads his case when I tell him he can't do something. He disputes every rule I create. How can I put an end to this?

Perfect Parenting Think about it: It takes two to argue. Your child cannot "argue" by himself. That's called "mumbling."

Say it once
Practice stating your case, then being quiet. Ignore your child's argumentative comments, and walk away if you must. Let your child get used to your word being "final."

Let 'em complain a bit:
As long as it's respectful, sometimes let your child have the last word. Often a statement, such as, "Why do I have to do it?" doesn't require an answer, nor does it deserve one. Often, a child's mutterings really mean, "I'll do it 'cuz I have to, but I don't like it."

Set rules for debating:
Some children really do enjoy debating an issue. If your child is like this, set ground rules for when and how issues can be debated. For instance: no raising of voices, no name calling, quiet listening to the other person's point of view. This behavior provides excellent practice for learning how to negotiate in life. In addition, your child must understand that some things cannot be argued, that there are some things the parents must decide. Have a standard reply for when an issue cannot be debated, such as, "This is not open for discussion."

Offer choices:

Pages:  1  2  3