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Toddlers Who Won't Listen
Tips for Developing Listening Skills and Handling Meltdowns
By Katherine Bontrager
Then try to redirect your little one's energies or ignore them altogether. "If your child is throwing his blocks at the window, you can explain to him that blocks are made for building, not throwing," Dr. Buchalter says. "Sit with him and show him how to build something with the blocks. Or find a soft beach ball and redirect the throwing activity using the beach ball instead of the blocks. This helps to teach your toddler what is acceptable and unacceptable types of activities. One strategy that can be useful, especially with older toddlers, is to ignore a tantrum. You need to exercise patience, as this can be trying for you, as a parent. However, by ignoring the undesirable behavior, your toddler will eventually stop what he's doing because he's not getting a reaction from you."
What is Talbot learning about the key to success with her headstrong Liam? "We're both learning to compromise," she says. "I used to be very regimented but the upside of this personality struggle is that he's made me see that sometimes I need to be a little more flexible. He isn't going to follow the mold that I'd intended for him and if he isn't getting hurt, being disruptive or hurting someone else, maybe there are times that I need to let it go. While I think we'll always have a battle of the wills, I've learned to choose my battles (i.e. let him wear navy Batman socks with his white sneakers and shorts if that's what he wants) and when it's important, I hold him close and insist that he make eye contact with me when I'm talking to him to reinforce how important it is that he does listen."
Getting face to face and holding your little one can be the strongest way to grab his attention. "Even though toddlers can often seem fiercely independent, they still need to be held, comforted and talked to," Dr. Buchalter says. "By exposing your toddler to a caring, loving and safe environment, you are giving him the best gift of all."