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Home › Articles › Multiples › Beyond the Twin Bond

Beyond the Twin Bond

Encouraging Relationships with Others

By Sabrina Glidden

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For example, you might try to avoid using the word "share," Samalin says. "Sharing indicates that I get less," she says. "Instead, say 'take turns,' which indicates that you get to play with something too, not that [you] get less of it."

Individual classes, such as piano or Karate, can also expand the experiential ground from which each child grows. Even if they both play soccer, Boyle says, one can be the goalie and the other play offense. Within similar sports, two children can have very different experiences, and both need to learn where their individual strengths and weaknesses lie.

As kids grow into the middle school and high school years, experiences become more varied as each child engages in different clubs, teams, groups and extracurricular activities. Samalin points to one interest that draws kids from all over to your home that can help keep your children's relationships with friends recurring and strong: food.

"Food is one thing that makes a home a welcoming place to kids from all different activity groups," she says. "Having the snack varieties that are popular to kids makes them feel welcome and increases the likelihood that they will come around often, expanding the many varieties of friends that are crucial to your child's socialization as an individual."

And when college finally rolls around, hopefully your hard work will help your twins to choose their own unique career paths. While their genetic or fraternal ties bind them as a set, their individual urgings are likely to take them down different roads. Families who have protected their individualities throughout the growing years can enjoy the knowledge that while their twins share a very special bond, they are also able to form meaningful relationships with others as they grow into adulthood and perhaps become parents themselves.

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