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What's the Story on Withholding?
Working Through a Common Training Challenge
By Kelly Burgess
"Kids with encopresis leak and appear to be incontinent," Dr. McVittie says. "Parents get mad and say, 'Why don't they just go on the toilet?' The fact is that this is a medical condition the child has no control over."
Treatment for encopresis varies depending on the cause and usually includes using laxatives for a period of time. But this is why it's important for a parent to seek the advice of the child's pediatrician when there is a withholding issue. Determining whether or not it's a medical problem can make the solution a lot easier for everyone.
Angela Lewis of Lynn, Mass., says her 4-year-old daughter Susanna was the "perfect child" in every way, never giving her any of the problems or issues many parents face when their children are in the baby/toddler years. That was until potty training. From the beginning, Lewis' daughter resisted potty training altogether. Finally about eight or nine months ago she began urinating regularly, but she absolutely refuses to poop in the toilet. Lewis has kept her sense of humor, but her frustration is evident.
"We have praised her every time she goes pee in the toilet," says Lewis. "We've high-fived and danced, all the while telling her she should go poop, too!"
So what do the experts think Lewis should do? Dr. Barton D. Schmitt, director of the after-hours call center at The Children's Hospital in Denver, Colo., and professor of pediatrics at the University of Colorado School of Medicine, says that in cases where there is no obvious medical issue, control needs to be given back to the child. In other words, Lewis should simply help Susanna deal with her toileting issues and then walk away. (See more of Dr. Schmitt's tips in the sidebar, below).
