A Family's Guide to Toilet Training

Maintaining Consistency with Caregivers

By Keath Castelloe Low

Your mother-in-law is watching your daughter for the weekend while you and your husband are away. There are so many details you've remembered to tell her in preparation: emergency numbers, the menu for snacks and meals, the importance of pink "blankey," naptimes and bedtimes. Oh wait; did you remember to mention that your daughter has just begun potty training? Is this important for your mother-in-law to know? Most definitely!

"Using the potty is actually a very complex task for little folks," say Dr. Linda Sonna, psychologist and author of three potty training books, including Early-Start Potty Training (McGraw-Hill, 2005). "All the caregivers need to be on the same page. Otherwise, toddlers get confused, have accidents and take a lot longer to learn."

What kind of information do parents need to give grandparents, aunts, uncles, older siblings, friends and babysitters who supervise a potty training child?

According to Sonna, the following information is important:

• Tell caregivers what times they should take your child to the potty.
• Let caregivers know about any special potty time rituals, such as the book your child looks at while sitting on the potty or the song you sing together.
• If you use a reward system, be sure the caregivers have a chart and a stack of stickers or rewards.
• Leave a calendar so they can note when your child asked to use the bathroom, went potty, had an accident, etc.
• Share how you handle accidents, and ask caregivers to respond in the same way – such as being gentle and having your child help with clean up.

Want to see more?

• Toddling off to School: Is Your Toddler Ready for Preschool?
• Tried and True Toilet Training Tips: A Potty Training Refresher
• Who's the Boss? Your Toddler Is at Potty Time!
• Check out our Article Library.
• Talk about it!