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Home › Articles › Family › Magical Moments

Magical Moments

Precious Memories from Our Children Come in Big and Small Sizes

By I.J. Schecter

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Shannon's husband, Mike, regards Abby's development with similar wonder, and, like Shannon, the moments that linger in his mind aren't the firsts so often asked about by other parents. "I remember more, for example, how she would imitate everything we'd do," he says. "If we coughed, she'd do a little fake cough, too. If we blew bubbles or vibrated our lips, she'd try to do the same. Part of it was that the behavior cracked me up, but it also signaled to me that here was an intelligent person, learning all the time – learning at a rate faster than we were aware of – and capable of great discoveries. Realizing this made a big difference in the way I looked at her."

Different Responses

It is important to acknowledge that you and your partner may not always get excited about the same things in the same way, at the same time or to the same extent. And you shouldn't hold this against each other. "It's perfectly natural for mothers and fathers to react differently to different things," Dr. Klaiman says. "There is no way to predict beforehand what's going to affect you, as a parent, most intensely. Nor should you expect the other person always to jump when you ask them to." Men and women tend to attribute different value to different behaviors, both for biological reasons and as a result of their own conditioning. Hence fathers' eyes widening with excitement the first time their son clumsily flips a ball in the air, or mothers melting at the smell of their baby's skin.

Then again, children change us in ways we don't expect. As a man, though you may never have felt a keen interest in touching or holding babies before, don't be surprised f you find you can't squeeze, kiss and caress your infant enough. And as a woman, you might just revel endlessly in those games of rolling the ball back and forth across the floor as your baby squeals with pride.


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