728x90
my iParenting
From Our Sponsors
e-newsletters
Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters

new terms of use
new privacy policy
award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Home › Articles › Development › Toddlers Who Won't Listen

Toddlers Who Won't Listen

Tips for Developing Listening Skills and Handling Meltdowns

By Katherine Bontrager

Pages:  1  2  3  4  

As part of this communication, it's important to tell your child why you're asking him to do something. For instance, "I've asked you not to throw the ball in the house because something could get broken. You or I or Daddy would be upset if something we liked was broken."

As well, tell your little one the end result if he refuses to do as you say – but because toddlers learn from actions, make sure you follow through. "If your toddler is refusing to do things you reasonably want done, make sure you remind your toddler that until he does what's been asked, you're not going to do X (which he wants to do)," Dr. Baum says. "Respectfully say, 'I know you want to do X and we'll do that as soon as we finish what I've told you we need to do first.' Again, don't give in but remain respectfully calm."

Make sure your toddler understands the connection between his refusal to listen or complete a task with the time-out or loss of an important toy or privilege – and this could be a challenge if he's getting visibly upset. Get down on his level and look into his eyes, ensuring that he understands the consequences for his actions.

Want to respect your little one's independence while making him own up to his actions? Dr. Baum suggests asking your toddler, "What is stopping you from doing what I've just asked you to do?" Then listen to the answer and address each point your toddler makes.

Avoiding and Handling Meltdowns

Aside from clearly communicating with a little person who really wants to be heard, you may also want to take a hard look at your daily schedule. "An important thing to remember is to establish a routine," Dr. Buchalter says. "Toddlers require a fair amount of sleep, so try to establish a reasonable bedtime and naps so that your toddler doesn't become overtired and cranky. Toddlers also need proper nourishment to keep up with their active bodies, so be sure to provide him with good meals and healthy snacks throughout the day. Remember: a hungry and tired toddler equals a cranky toddler who doesn't listen."

But sometimes, despite all the rational communication, your toddler goes into meltdown. "Any parent of a toddler has experienced a temper tantrum at one time or another," Dr. Buchalter says. "The key to getting through it is to remain calm. If you get agitated, it might upset your toddler even more. Stay calm – your composure will eventually rub off on your child."

Pages:  1  2  3  4  


Want to see more?