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Home › Articles › Discipline › Revenge of the Toddler

Revenge of the Toddler

Empowering Your Spirited Child

By Laura Cone

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Pushing, Hitting and Throwing
We often teach our toddlers to throw balls. Then, when they throw a heavy, hard truck at us, we squeal with pain and wonder if they are getting back at us for taking away their lunch plate.

Sheedy Kurcinka says the key is to tell your child you know he wants to throw something. Then say, "Let's go find something to throw," as you search for a ball. "Instead of being angry, you realize you have to show them how to hand a truck," she says. "You say to them, 'We don't throw trucks. We hand trucks.'"

When it comes to breaking up fights between siblings and friends, realize you are the coach, says Sheedy Kurcinka. If your toddler hits, pushes or grabs toys from other children, realize toddlers don't share because they are learning what is "mine." Sheedy Kurcinka recommends telling your toddler, "He has that. Let's find another one." "If they hit, we take their hand and say, 'We don't hit. We are gentle.' Then we stroke the other child's arm," shesays.

Creative Discipline
Melisa Dean of Lutz, Fla., says she often looks for creative ways to discipline her child, Lindsey, 4. When she was having trouble potty training her daughter, Dean read about having a "happy" and "sad" jar for a child. She would take a marble out of the sad jar and put it in the happy jar every time Lindsey used the bathroom bowl instead of her diaper.

"When she got all the marbles into the happy jars, she got a prize," Dean says. "We use that now for disciplines. If she has a bad attitude she gets a marble out of the happy jar and into the sad. When she has good manners or eats right, we use that a lot. Even for a little toddler it works." When her daughter ptched a tantrum or "fake cried," Dean told her to go watch herself in the mirror.

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